AIR - So Light Is Her Footfall

In a crazy, mixed up, shook up world it's nice to be able to turn out all the lights, curl up under your duvet, turn up your speakers and just zone out. That's exactly what I'm doing with this song. It's a mellow synth-physcadelic, Pink Floyd meets a French accent. Their fifth album 'Love 2' is due out October 6th.

Download: AIR - So Light Is Her Footfall

Quit Life: Episode 1

Good evening, it's 9 o'clock, do you know where your children are? This interweb contraption is a very magical thing. Everything and anything one could ever want is at the tip of one's fingers. Whether you're into hispanic midget's having relations with horses, or just catching up on the episodes of 'Will & Grace' you missed (don't worry I won't judge) the interweb has something for everyone. Take me for example.. My main reason for getting dail-up installed on my brand new Windows 98 ME is to pick up hot broads in chatrooms with screennames like HornySexyWetDevilGirl1958 and cyber with them while I practise the art of one hand typing. Because I mean that's what scoring chicks is all about right? Every once and a while I will get tired of all the cyber-poon I slam on ICQ chat and will venture off into the vast highway of information known as.. 'The Information Highway'. Today was one of those days. And on my journey I discovered a human being like no other I have seen before.

This video has inspired me to create a new feature to this blog called 'Quit Life'. It will feature people who excel in the aspect of being total douche bags. Meet the 2009 Pokemon World Champion. This kid -if you could even call him that- honestly looks like someone had created a device to take cartoon characters and somehow transform them into real life people and used it on Peter Griffin. Seriously, you're fat, have a lisp and play Pokemon professionally? Do you ever want to have a girl touch your penis? I'll go easy on him though, because it's clearly the fault of the father. It's one thing to blow a little smoke up your kid's ass and pretend to give a fuck about his intrests so he doesn't hang himself in his closet, but DRIVING them around over 50 thousand miles across the country to play cards with a bunch of other little fucktards is a whole different stroke of stupid. I really wish I had a time machine and a laser gun so I could use the time machine to travel back into time and use the laser gun to shoot off that dudes ballsack to prevent him from using his loser semen to help birth such a fucking tub of shit abomination. He says he is proud of his son. LOL! Proud of him for what? The fact that he's obese, cries himself to sleep everynight, the closest he's ever going to get to a vagina is the one his mother shit him out of or the fact he's going to grow up to be serial killer who eats human flesh? Way to go pops, congratulations on your fine parental skills and succeeding in raising a bigger fuck up than you.

Was that a tad bit harsh or am I just being too sensitive?

Rage Against The Machine - Killing In The Name Of (SebastiAn's Late Night Laptop Edit)

I've recently broadened my musical tastes to include the whole Electro/ House movement, so I'm fairly new to the genre. But I know what I like when I hear it and I like this. The first 50 seconds of this remix is incredible. Don't get me wrong, the whole thing is good, but that opening sequence makes me wanna dip my balls in it. I didn't even think anyone would attempt remixing an RATM song in the first place, goes to show what I don't know.

Download: Rage Against The Machine - Killing In The Name Of (SebastiAn's Late Night Laptop Edit)

Yael Naim - Toxic (Britney Spears Cover)

The list of things that I love is very short. My mother, cigarettes, alcohol, sex, money, music, clothes and this song.. From the moment I heard this on Et Musique Pour Tous I was instantaneously lovestruck. This is the same girl who sang that very catchy tune 'New Soul' from the iPod commercial. If you are as enthralled by it as me, there is a download link at the bottom.



Download: Yael Naim - Toxic (Britney Spears Cover)

Brett Fav-ree

As much as I hate the guy, I respect the fuck out of him on the field. Anytime a player as old as the dust on Joan Rivers pussy can pull one out of his ass like that I tip my hat. Sure he's about as predictable personality wise as a manic depressive, bi-polar on the rag, but when he straps on his helmet you can put your bottom dollar on him. He's been stealing last minute wins since his rookie season over 47 years ago. Not to take anything away from the game winning throw, but the catch was even more outstanding then his toss. Although if he hadn't moved it downfield 80 yards with under a minute and no timeouts, none of it would have been possible.

After the crushing defeat, 49er's head coach Mike Singletary had this to say at the press-conference, "I want them to chew it up and swallow it, and remember it." Now I'm a little confused as to whether he's talking about the loss or Brett Favre's dick in their mouths after he face-fucked them. Open wide boys.

Dip My Balls In It!

A very bizarre sketch comedy show that ran on MTV, 'The State' has recently been released on DVD. Despite rave reviews and a small cult following, lack of advertisment lead to sub-par viewer ratings and subsequent cancellation. The short lived 29 episode show was extremely popular among high school and college students. During it's run from 1993 - 1995, catch phrases from the show became part of everyday vanacular for it's younger audience. Known for it's off-the-wall characters and off-colour skits, the creators of the show wanted to do something different from the cookie cutter sketch comedy programs out at the time. Consisting of 11 regular cast members, whom are all still active in Hollywood, there are some familiar faces. Some notable cast members include Ken Marino ('Role Models'), Thomas Lennon ('Role Models', 'I Love You Man', 'Reno 911!'), Joe Lo Truglio ('Pineapple Express', 'I Love You Man' and upcoming movie 'Paul'). For more information on the cast, the show and where to get your hands on a copy of the DVD, CLICK HERE.

This re-enactment of the Last Supper contains one of the greatest catch-phrases of our time.. "I WANNA DIP MY BALLS IN IT!!"

Jon Lajoie, the foul-mouthed, uber-profane, Canadian kid's newest video for 'Radio Friendly Song'. Chances are if you're reading this blog you aren't one of the pussies mentioned in this song. But you probably are still a pussy in some capacity of your life. Fuck shit cock.



BONUS VIDEO - MC Vagina sings a song about Strombo.

Cox Is A Fox

I've never really been a fan of Courtney Cox, but she is definately a smokeshow. She was on Jimmy Kimmel a few nights ago talking about cougars. Meow!

It's More Than You Imagined

HBO has managed to do it again. From Entourage to Californication to Curb Your Enthusiasm to True Blood. To their groundbreaking programming on the ass-end of the week, they have made Sunday nights more manageable for those still recovering from the weekend and those dreading the upcoming work week. They have launched a new website called HBO Imagine that boasts a very conceptual design and interactive page layout. It headlines an intricate and seemingly irrelevant mix of video clips, sound bites and newspaper articles. It is only after you have completed the maze that everything will be pieced together. They have also implemented a cube like video player, aptly named the 'HBO cube' that when rotated, reveals more angles that uncover there is more to the scene then first meets the eye. If you have some time to kill in between accepting friend requests and banging out photo comments on Facebook, I highly recommend you check this out.

HBO Imagine




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Why Can't We Be Friends?

I would like to change pace a bit here and talk about a very important subject that is forefront on every body's minds, religion. Now being of Protestant and Jewish descent this is very personal for me. In order to ease tensions and end the dick swinging, we must celebrate the similarities instead of dwelling on the differences. We must focus on the positives each other brings to the table. Stop spreading the belief that if someone worships any God other than your own they are going to be playing Twister with Hitler and Andre the Giant listening to the musical stylings of the Tragically Shit for eternity.

I think I have found a sure fire way to bring peace to the world, something that tree smoking/hugging hippies, half-witted celebrities and generations of brain dead beauty pageant contestants have been promising to eradicate since the Japs shit on Pearl Harbour. Allow me to elaborate..

Jews, yes you may have exiled your King, tortured and humiliated the only begotten son, crucified the lord and saviour.. But you own the whole world. Banks, run by Jews. Music industry, run by Jews. Movie industry, run by Jews. I mean you guys profited monetarily from the story of how you brutalized Jesus, pure fucking genius. Although getting Mel Gibson to direct that, in hindsight probably wasn't the greatest Gentile for the job. Seriously though, think of any one of your favourite actors, if you see a stein, green, gold, berg, or sandler anywhere in their name, odds are they're Jewish. And the next time you drop off a suit to be dry cleaned, take a look at that man you are entrusting with your precious linens, and if he's not Chinese, chances are he prefers Hanukkah.

Muslims, if you take a step back and really look at it, you and the Jews aren't so different. For example, you both share a dislike for pork and meats that aren't blessed. You call it Halal, they call it Kosher, same shit different pile. The only difference is I've never had a slice of Kosher pizza or a Halal pickle but I'm sure they would both be equally delicious. And you are a wise bunch, you learned from the Jews. You saw how loud and obnoxious their women were and you took steps to make sure yours didn't follow suit. The same goes with the Christians, if you look back in history, they also wore sandals all year round, what a popular fashion statement that became. All I'm saying is the last time me and my father fought over a strip, we cut it in half and shared it. That way we were both happy. You should try doing the same.

Next up is the Christians. What a sordid lot you are. But you may have made one of the most influential free agent signings in history. You were savvy enough to lock Jesus into a long-term deal after the Jews placed Him on waivers. You built your empire around this franchise player and to prove your dedication to Him, not only did you make Him captain but you named your team after Him. You also blessed us with numerous major holidays and long weekends such as Christmas and Easter. Though I'm still not sure what the rebirth of Christ has to do with faggoty looking eggs and bunnies.. Where did you come up with that shit? I mean everything about the holiday is just downright fucking weird. Rabbits hopping around with painted chicken eggs hiding them in peoples houses, what the fuck? See there's something else we can agree on Easter = Mindfuck.

This brings me to Catholics. Possibly the most turbulent of all the religions. You and the Christians are like the twin brothers back in grade school that just never got along. You sound alike and look the same, but one is always trying to out do the other. You both got the exact same lunches packed for you but it was never the same in your eyes. Though your beliefs and ideologies may vary slightly, you continue to fight tooth and nail for the title of supreme sibling. Truth is, daddy loves you both the same. One thing that can be said for Catholicism is the slutty Catholic school girls. Whores in short skirts who don't believe in using condoms.. Just thinking about it makes my cup runneth over. Give me a Catholic girl, I'll make sure she kneels before me and prays. That is what tolerance is all about. Even though my grandmother was a devout Irish protestant I would be willing to make a Catholic girl scream out for God. Another good trait Catholics possess is their dedication to spreading their gospel and helping younger members of the religion find their way. All the extra time and effort the priests devote to the alter boys. Keeping them late after Sunday school to answer any questions they might have, taking them on educational trips, letting them sleepover at their houses and even teaching them the sins of carnal desires, premarital sex and even homoerotic fantasies. Come to think of it Michael Jackson was a good Catholic too wasn't he? And you guys have a Pope. And he rides around in the Popemobile. How fucking cool is that?

I hope this was able to bring our people together. Remember, we are all one world under God and no matter your religion there is an afterlife that awaits us all. Be it virgins in heaven or reincarnation on Earth we have something to look forward to. Unless you're Atheist, then your coming back as Starr Jones thong.

I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell

In case you have been living in the communist nation of China or under the dictatorship of Kim Jong-Il or you are poor and can't afford internet (how the fuck are you reading this?) then you should know who Tucker Max is. On the offchance you are not familiar, he is a role model for young pre-pubecent boys and grown men alike. He basically got famous for his legendary tales of his sexual escapades (or sexcapades). Well he made a website dedicated to sharing these stories with the world. The site was such a hit, it eventually lead to a book deal. The book was suprisingly.. You guessed it.. Also a hit. Which in turn lead to a movie by the same name, 'I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell'. So a big fuck you to everyone who ever said that poking chicks and treating women like shit won't get you anywhere in life. The movie is slated for a select realease in the States on Friday. Not sure what that means for us up here in the 'Da. For more check out http://tuckermax.com/ and http://www.ihopetheyservebeerinhell.com/ Those are real fucking hard to remember, better write that shit down.

She Sucks

I do not believe in the institution of marriage what-so-ever. If you really love someone you do not need some big fancy wedding in a perfectly set backdrop surrounded by hundreds of your closest friends and family to justify that love. And you certainly do not some dick in a robe sanctifying it either. But I would abandon all my principles in heartbeat and marry this broad if I could make sex to her every night. All I know about Vikki Blow is that she is fucking hot and very rarely wears clothes. If that's not enough reason to want to spend the rest of your life with someone, then what is my friends, what is?

*WARNING* The following pictures contain nudity. If you are offended by it, grow a dick.

Better Late Then Never.. Right?

Okay so today I'm dedicating this post to a few things that I slept on and upon review have decided I should've posted in the first place. I figured what better time then now, since the theme of this week is procrastination (there may be a more suitable word, but I have yet to think of one yet) since I have been too busy to post in a few days.. More like too lazy. The first being that 'Supernova' song from Mr. Hudson and the always affable Kanye West. I actually first heard about this maybe a month ago from Pidgeons & Planes (check it out, always in the loop) and wasn't anything that caught my attention. I heard the song today on a commercial and did some research and found out there was a video, which I would post but UMG is touchy about embedding videos. Needless to say the song has grown on me. Maybe the rest of their work will too.



The second thing I put off was the Harlem Shakes, like the dance. Or the drink. If there is one. Anyways, this is a solid band, kinda have the nerdy vocals going on. I like. The video for 'Stricly Game' at first glance just seems like a picture montage video that some 13 year old made on his moms laptop. But look closer.. Very cool.

Oh Yeah Yeah Yeah

I don't use the word 'beautiful' very often, especially not when talking about music, but that's exactly what this is. The 'Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs' have had their moments with a few iPod-worthy cuts. But their latest album 'It's Blitz' certainly gratified my ear drums. If this doesn't make you instantly fall in love with this band from the Big Apple then I'm not sure what will.

President Obama Calls Kanye A Jackass

I guess George Bush isn't the only one who doesn't care about black people.

Instant Boner

Dude my fucking cock is rock hard.. All 3 inches of it. Megan Fox and Amanda Seyfried share a bit of spit in the new flick Jennifer's Body. I for one will pay my 15 dollars just for this scene. Fuck me, imagine Megan Fox's lips on another girls lips on the big screen in surround sound. I'll be there in the back row of the theatre doing my best Pee Wee Herman impression. Butter for your popcorn ma'am?

Guns Don't Kill People.. Major Lazer Does!

Certainly not a reggae head rude bwoy, but I could definately signal the plane to this shit. Not bad for two honky ass crackers. Diplo + Switch = Major Lazer.

Use Somebody Too

I do not like Paramore. There I said it. Most of their songs sound the same, which is a bad thing, because their songs aren't good. I do think they are on to something here.. Covering songs from better bands.

Kanye On Leno Tonight

For all of you Toronto heads, the living legend himself will be on The Jay Leno Show tonight at 10 PM on CityTV. I'm very interested to see what will transpire. Leno will definately come at him hard, but I have faith in my man.

Kanye West Is My Hero

So everyone knows by now what the hot topic currently is. Quite frankly I don't understand why everyone is so up in arms. I guess it's me and Yeezy against the world. Dude is a pure genius. The publicity he has gained from this is unreal. This story is on every news outlet, blog, youtube channel from here to Peru. Type Kanye West's name into twitter and see how many fucking tweets he has since last night. You couldn't buy better PR than this. And not just for himself, but for Taylor as well. I'll admit I never even knew who she was before Mr. West blessed her with his presence on the stage. She has become an overnight sensation thanks to him. And he did it with such class, you would think all the fame would go to his head, but no, he's still a humble human being. Seriously watch the video again. He told her he was happy for her and even decided that he would allow her to finish her acceptance. Wow.. I'm speechless. To be able to go up there live in front of millions of people around the world and do the right thing and stick up for Beyonce, takes guts. To Top it all off he immediately issued an apology on his personal blog even though he had nothing to be sorry for. If anyone should be apologizing it should be Beyonce for not coming forward and defending 'Ye after what he did for her. Some people just have no morals.

Kanye West's Apology To Taylor Swift

Have your tissues handy. Not to masturbate into, to wipe the tears away. Because this song is a tear-jerker.

Lady Gag

No that wasn't a typo, she actually makes me gag. I mean who doesn't enjoy a bit of bondage, a smidgen of S&M, a tad.. okay you get the point. But what the fuck is with the paint? It looks like something my 7 year old retarded cousin Rupert would do in Special Ed.(and I mean that in the kindest way possible - I love the little bastard). Not to mention the floppy tits, gross. 18 and having that horrible of a rack, the future isn't looking too good for you sweetheart. I guess I might just be jealous of her/ him. If she/he needs both hands to cover her/his penis.. Let's just say it must have one hell of a bigger dick than me.

Dude, Where's My Hair?

It has just come to my attention that Andrew VanWyngarden, one half of MGMT, has cut his hair. During a show in Brooklyn at Prospect Park, he was seen sporting his new doo. Known for his homeless-esque shag, his hair appeared to have considerable length taken off the top, the sides, the back and even the front! Fans worldwide fear that this will have an adverse effect on the band and their music.


And they also played a few new songs off the upcoming album, 'Congratulations'.

And Justice For All

Now you might be thinking "Wow, these are very old, get with the times, we want new shit"! To which I reply, "I don't care, this is my blog. I will post what I want and you WILL like it". Now a little bit about Justice. Consisting of Gaspard Auge (it has that little thing above the 'e' but I can't be bothered trying to figure out how that shit works) and Xavier de Rosnay, Justice gained notarity in 2003 for their remix of Simian Mobile Disco's song 'Never Be Alone' entitled 'We Are Your Friends' for a local Paris college radio station. They earned a 2009 grammy for their remix of MGMT's 'Electric Feel'. Their first album was released in 2007 and their sophmore effort is set for early 2010. Oh, and they are Christians. High five for Jesus!



The video for 'Stress' is insanely intense and was directed by Romain Garvas, check out some of his work. And the video for 'D.A.N.C.E.' is just flat out fuckin cool. Enjoy!

And Everything Is Going To The Beat

Passion Pit pit is a band out of Buffalo by way of Boston. Or wait, would it be from Boston by way of Buffalo? Anyways, they realeased their sophmore effort in late May called Manners. Very listen-to worthy, take it from me, a complete stranger on the interweb. There are also numerous remixes floating around that won't disappoint. The first two videos are singles from the album and the third is a remix of Ghost Under Rocks by Ra Ra Riot, which I think is better than the original. The Reeling is amazing video as well as a great song. Enjoy!

Passion Pit - The Reeling


Passion Pit - Sleepyhead


Ra Ra Riot - Ghost Under Rocks (Passion Pit Remix)